do you ever step back & reevaluate your life
& all the harmful shit you internalized
like concepts of virginity, beauty, healthy relationships, sexual attraction, mental health, & what “being successful” actually entails?
& you realized how much healthier you’d be right now if someone actually fuckin’ talked to you about this toxic shit instead of throwing you into a perpetual pit of self-loathing that you have to claw your way out of?
1. You woke up this morning! A lot of people didn’t. And a lot of people who did, won’t survive the day. This isn’t to depress you or make you think about death and get sad and stuff, it’s just a reminder that we’ve hit the jackpot having the opportunity of life. There’s always something or someone to be grateful for right this second, we just have to stop letting monotony diminish the value of and our appreciation for friends, family, good health, food, water, technology, and all that other amazing stuff. Gratitude y’all.
2. There are some flat out mean-spirited individuals who have made spewing hate and negativity their sole purpose. When you identify one of these discouraging people trying to drag you down, slow your drive, crush your confidence or compact your dreams, don’t engage. Don’t react as if their words hold any merit, and don’t seek revenge. That will only veer you off track and turn you into a pessimist yourself. Do what you do and slap a hater in the face with success.
3. Don’t compare or concern yourself with everybody else. We all know that person who is so successful, every time you speak to them it makes you want to go home and work on your résumé, but any time spent envying others or wondering why you can’t be in their position should be used productively, pursuing whatever makes you happy. There’s always someone doing a lot better than you and there’s always someone doing much worse.
4. If there’s something you want, but it’s high risk, high reward — take that chance before you’re no longer able to. Rejection feels bad, failure feels awful, but regret feels the worst. Disappointment that we passed on something and the train left the station without us. A dream, a girl, a guy, words left unspoken – you can erase the possibility of having these regrets down the road, by taking a chance and at least knowing if it was or wasn’t meant to be.
5. All of the best things will eventually end. I personally hate endings, I won’t even listen to the last track on albums all the way through, skipping back to the beginning before it can finish playing all the way through. The thing is, your current group of friends, the weekend routines you’ve adopted in recent months, the group of co-workers you adore – eventually people move, you leave, casts and locations change, and suddenly it’s a whole new show. Thoroughly enjoy whatever it is you’re enjoying until you right now becomes, “Remember back when…”
6. Don’t judge. You ain’t Judy, you ain’t Joe Brown, and you definitely aren’t God, so refrain from condemning and labeling others. I know, it’s easy to make assumptions and have preconceived notions, but that’s why prejudice, narrow-minded folks, who confuse their opinions with facts and know exactly how everyone else should be living life are so common. We live in a world where passing judgment is commonplace and tolerant, accepting people are an endangered species. Remember, you simply don’t know a person’s background based on past experiences with individuals of the same gender, race, sexual orientation, belief system, etc.
7. If you there’s anything you’re doing that makes you unhappy, and it’s being done for the satisfaction of somebody else, stop it immediately. No ifs, ands or buts — your time and happiness should never be sacrificed to fulfill the standards or satisfaction of others.
8. You can’t remain at a job or in a career field that you despise. When your days off are spent dreading having to return to work or class, you’ve got to get out. It’s easy to think, I have bills to pay and this or that reason to stay miserable, and if that’s entirely true then you have to do what you can to live, but there are still ways of forming a hasty exit plan. Save up the funds to take an extended leave, apply at the place you actually want to work, take some type of progressive step toward a means of living that you find happiness in. That first step is always the hardest to take.
9. Use your words! If you don’t know the answer, ask. Too often we try to read people’s minds instead of asking, and hoping for others to read our minds instead of us having to speaking about what’s on ‘em. Communication over psychic abilities all day, every day.
10. Live below your means and you’ll be a lot better off. Even if you’ve mastered the paycheck-to-paycheck life (which is actually like being really good at being really bad at something), budgeting and not buying what you really can’t afford will result in less stress and close calls.
11. Some problems you’ll have the power to change, other things will be beyond your control. Identify which type of issue you’re dealing with. If you’ve got some say in the matter, let your figurative voice be heard. When it’s literally out of your hands, have faith and believe it’ll improve. If a situation ever gets so bad that you feel as if you don’t have the energy or power to muster up wishing for a miracle anymore, just remember that there’s always a chance it’ll get better, no matter what it is. Keep fighting the good fight.
“The bravest thing I ever did was continuing my life when I wanted to die.”
- Accidentally offending people
- Accidentally fucking things up
- Deliberately offending people
- Deliberately fucking things up